


Prompt #32

by grandmelon



Series: Ficlet Collection [8]
Category: Free!
Genre: Friendship/Love, Love, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-23
Updated: 2016-06-23
Packaged: 2018-07-16 17:26:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7277173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grandmelon/pseuds/grandmelon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A fic I wrote on tumblr for a <a href="http://melonmachinery.tumblr.com/post/145989846143/send-me-a-pairing-and-a-number-and-ill-write-you">prompt meme</a></p><p>Prompt: “I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prompt #32

Haru felt cold though the bathwater was warm. He thought that everything would have settled down. That the feelings of despair gnawing at him would have disappeared after returning home, after seeing Makoto so willingly accept him after their fight. He thought that after the relay everything would go back to normal.

It hadn’t. The turmoil twisting his stomach did not leave. Its temporary disappearance was misleading. The future was still terrifying, he thought himself smart to be going to Tokyo, to follow not only his dreams but Makoto. He was mistaken. When he told Makoto what he was planning there was nothing but surprise in the other’s eyes. There was no joy, not until after.

Maybe Makoto had just been too shocked to be happy, but it wasn’t that surprising. It shouldn’t have been that surprising, or at least that’s what he told himself. Was it weird? Did Makoto sense that it wasn’t just for swimming that he chose Tokyo? Had Makoto seen how he couldn’t survive without him?

The thought of Makoto leaving, a life without Makoto, it wasn’t possible. He couldn’t bring himself to imagine a future without him. But Makoto had chosen Tokyo without him, so maybe it wasn’t the same for him. It was Haru who needed him, even if Makoto never saw it. Haru slid down the tub, submerging himself in water.

His inner storm did not leave him. The pulsating of his ears, the heaviness of water that was once comforting only emphasized how he was avoiding what was really wrong.

He was in love, probably.

There was nothing else he could think of that would explain his feelings. Nothing else could explain his fear of Makoto leaving, his resentment of Makoto’s ability to charm anyone, his worry at the increase in confession letters as their third year came to an end. It had to be because he wanted Makoto to be his, but he wanted to be Makoto’s too. He wanted to be special, and as the ending of their school years together came, the term childhood friend began to lose its meaning.

Best friend was something special, but not everything. Haru wanted everything.

Haru sat up and got out of the tub, drying off and getting dressed. As he went to exit the bathroom he hit a large body, stumbling back as he heard a yelp. He looked up to see his favorite face in the whole world looking baffled at his appearance.

“Haru!? You’re dressed already? I—well I mean that’s great!” Makoto babbled, stepping out of the way and back into the kitchen. “I was worried you would have forgotten that we were supposed to meet up with Nagisa and Rei to go shopping for party supplies. I was thinking while we were at it we could buy stuff for dinner tonight. You have to eat something other than mackerel sometimes you know—Haru? Is something wrong?”

“I,” Haru breathed, looking at his best friend. Steeling himself for the plunge, he felt like there was nothing to do except explain himself to his best friend. “I think I’m in love with you and I’m terrified. I—I don’t know what to do Makoto.”

Makoto dropped the plastic container he just pulled out of the fridge, its contents spilling over the floor. Wide eyes dropped from him to the floor, Makoto instantly getting to his knees trying to clean up the mess. “Oh no! Sorry Haru, I’ll clean this up in a second I just—here let me get something to clean this up!”

Haru got down to help, scooping the noodles back into the box with his hand. When Makoto got back most of the food was picked up, only that which was too small to grab left over. Makoto began to wipe it up with the wet towels, muttering all the while.

“Makoto. What do I do?” Haru asked, looking down at the kitchen floor. He felt Makoto still, his rushed apologies dying on his lips.

“Haru,” Makoto whispered, a distinct worried tone to his voice. Haru flinched, looking away. “Haru do you mean it? Do you really love me?”

Haru didn’t say anything, not knowing what he could say. He thought he did, he was sure he did, but saying it out loud felt so cheap. Instead he nodded, holding his tongue. He wasn’t sure what else to do.

There was nothing for him to do, he realized, as Makoto wrapped his arms around his shoulders. He leaned over the mess, hugging him tight. Haru’s arms wrapped around Makoto’s waist, their balance was shaky, but their grip on each other strong. He held onto the slippery fabric of Makoto’s jacket with greasy fingers.

Makoto would scold him for it later, but all he could think about was the sound of Makoto’s voice in his ear.

It took him awhile to realize that he was telling him he loved him too.

**Author's Note:**

> [original post](http://melonmachinery.tumblr.com/post/146032129428/makoharu-32-pls-3)


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